My First Mother’s Day as a Young Widow

Mother’s day is quickly approaching.  It’s another first “holiday” I have to endure as a young widow.

Just like all the other holidays that have come and gone since Chaz died, I try to just not to think about it…

But sometimes I can’t help it.  And I begin to dwell in it.

My thoughts for Mothers Day were really pretty selfish.  Basically I was thinking that Chaz wasn’t going to be around to organize the kids to “get” me something.  And it’s not like I wanted “stuff,” but more along the lines of doing some kind of keepsake, like the footprints or handprints.  He did really well last year and made me a big growth chart to measure the kids’ heights.  It was awesome.

So, I was feeling kind of ‘blah‘ about not having anyone to do that for me this year.

And I know that’s not what Mother’s Day is all about.  I should feel lucky and privileged that I even get to be a mom.  And I do!  But still…

It’s just really hard.

Despite being selfish, I actually DID end up getting the keepsakes I thought I was going to miss out on!

I totally forgot that the kids’ daycare center has them make little Mother’s Day crafts!

So when I picked them up on Wednesday evening (our last day of the week at daycare, since I work part time), I had some special gifts waiting for me!

My gift from Will was this adorable potholder.  It has his hand-print on one side, and on the other it has a cute little quote/poem/saying (I’m not really sure what you call it!).

It says:

“I know you wipe some away, but these prints were made to stay.  So keep them forever, a treasure they’ll be, a special ‘I love you’ to you from me.”

And I really will treasure it!  I absolutely LOVE anything with my kids hand-prints on it, because they grow so fast, so it’s nice to look back and remember how tiny they once were.  So this hand-print potholder was PERFECT!

From the girls, I got these super cute flower pots.  The girls obviously decorated the pots themselves.  There is paint, glitter, and stickers all over them!  And I love it!  I love that they were able to contribute to the gift in their own unique way. 🙂

On the front, the teacher wrote “Happy Mothers Day!”  Inside there was a little bit of potting soil, 2 packets of flower seeds, and the girls’ pictures, as you can clearly see! 🙂

Again, absolutely PERFECT for me.  I am completely picture crazy! I take a ton of pictures all the time, because like I said before, I just want to remember how small they once were.

Plus, I love the fact that growing the flowers will be a “project” that I can involve the girls in.  I think they’ll find it interesting to watch the flowers grow each day. At least, I hope they will!  So it kind of extends Mother’s Day beyond just one day.  We’ll be able to continue the fun, and make memories from it! 🙂

Those 3 little gifts alone were ALL I needed.  I had my keepsakes.  And it helped provide a little light into my dark thoughts.  I’m not saying it made me feel incredibly joyous, because I always have the constant pain of Chaz’s absence in everything that happens to me.  But it helped a little…

Well, I had thought that would be it for my Mother’s Day, so I was extremely surprised when a package showed up at our door on Thursday.  Inside, were chocolate covered strawberries and cake pops from Shari’s Berries.  Yum-yum-yum!!!  I know the picture below is horrible… I didn’t think to take a picture until after I had pigged out on half the strawberries! 🙂  But they were delicious!

Isn’t it funny how sometimes chocolate is just what you need to get through a rough night? 🙂

The card said it was from Violet, Charlotte, and Will…  But since I don’t think they are really into online shopping yet, I’m assuming my mother-in-law ordered this for me (and you can see what I got her by clicking here).  How sweet is she?!?!  (Pun intended :-))

Now this had gone way above and beyond my expectations of gifts for Mother’s Day.

So, I was ever MORE surprised on Friday evening, when a few of the teachers from the kids’ daycare showed up at our house.

They had a GIGANTIC gift basket for me!  Needless to say, I was completely SHOCKED!

They explained to me that they had collected some funds from the daycare teachers, along with some of the parents from the girls’ classroom, to get this for me.  They said they just wanted to make my Mother’s Day feel special, and to give me some pampering.

Oh. My. Word.  That is just so incredible!  I can’t even explain how this made me feel.  I was so touched that the people in our lives continue to think about us, 9 months after Chaz’s death.  We have seriously been surrounded by wonderful, generous, caring, and kind people.  My gratitude for them is never-ending.

Ok, so now this was SO FAR beyond my expectations, it’s in another galaxy! 🙂

The gift basket was absolutely wonderful.  And it was filled with so many goodies.  I NEVER, EVER buy these types of things for myself, I’m just always focused on the kids needs.  So it’s just so nice to receive these special items.  Actually, they are more than special, everything in here is an absolute LUXURY in my life.

 The basket and bag included: a canvas print of our family picture, a cute picture of the girls in a frame, wine coolers, different lotions, body washes, soaps, and hair products, a scented candle, a decorated cookie, and gift cards to a salon & spa, Starbucks, and a nail salon.

Wow!  Seriously, W.O.W!

I really just can’t get over it.  This means SO MUCH to me.  I am just so honored to be surrounded by these wonderful people.  I don’t think they have any idea how grateful I am, and I just don’t know if I will be able to express it in the right words.  I wish I could just put my feelings on the table for them to see! 🙂

So, despite my dread regarding Mother’s Day, it really has taken a slight turn for the better…

And it’s these acts of kindness towards Me Plus 3 that make me want to pay it forward.  I just don’t feel like we deserve these wonderful gifts and expressions of kindness.  I hope that we will be able to bring a little bit of light in someone’s life that may feel so dark to them.

I guess I’d say that paying forward the small ray of light that shined into our hard times, grows that little ray even bigger and brighter.  Hopefully someday, the light in our lives will once again exceed the dark.  And we’ll keep on working for that.

Do you know someone who is having a hard time?  Someone who’s life may be feeling dark?  I hope by showing you how much these gestures meant to me, it will inspire you to reach out to that person.  It doesn’t have to be something grand like what I got from the daycare teachers and parents.  A card with a short note, a candy bar, or even just giving them a call to say ‘Hi’ would probably do wonders for that person.

Please, spread the LIGHT this Mother’s Day!

Well, that’s what’s going on with Me… TODAY!